Two things scale proportionately with the level of your personal freedom: The opportunities you have to create a fulfilling life, and the anxiety you experience.

Everyone wants personal freedom, and with good reason: who wants to be told what to do? We like to think of ourselves as autonomous and independent, able to create our lives as we see fit, chasing our unique destiny with steely-eyed intent.

The goal is to drink in the rich experience of life and discard the empty activities that waste our time; to set a course to the destinations we choose without interruption or hindrance. Many of us work for decades to become the captains of our own proverbial ships because we have a vision of our purpose, the highest and best use of our time on the planet.

Or, as my daughter used to say with a snap of her fingers, “I do what I want!”

The Pursuit of Purpose

If you are familiar with my website or have followed my Instagram or Twitter accounts for any length of time, you know that I take the pursuit of purpose very seriously. I believe that distractions from your purpose serve only to distance you from the long-lasting, deep sense of well-being that I call Hardcore Happiness.

Viktor Frankl famously said, “When a person can’t find a deep sense of meaning, they distract themselves with pleasure.”  This analysis begs for an exegesis that differentiates hedonic pleasure from eudaimonic satisfaction as distinct forms of what we overgeneralize as “happiness.” But that is best left for a future article.

What will undoubtedly not surprise you is that the pursuit of purpose and happiness – the pursuit of personal freedom – is not a simple matter. In today’s world there are myriad factors that compete with your ability to simply “do what you want.” Bills must be paid, children raised, careers nurtured, empires built.

If you live anywhere in what is commonly (if sometimes erroneously) referred to as the “modern” world, you know that you need resources to have personal freedom. Said resources almost always include money, and money always exacts some measure of your time and attention, whether you earn a salary or own your own company.

What likely will surprise you (unless you have already taken this journey, in which case I want to hear from you – sound off in the comments wherever you found this piece) is the fact that when you achieve some degree of personal freedom, anxiety is its inseparable companion.

This is not to say that the possibility of anxiety should dissuade you from pursuit of your own personal freedom; anxiety is also the handmaiden of poverty and servitude. In as far as you can pick your anxiety, I highly recommend the anxiety that accompanies a greater degree of personal choice in your life.

Personal Freedom’s Dark Side – Anxiety

While there are as many sources of anxiety as there are personalities, I routinely come across four in my work. Most frequently cited among them is what I call “scarcity dread.”

Psychological research reliably tells us that people are more afraid of losing something than they are excited about getting something else. This is scarcity dread – the fear that you may lose that for which you have assiduously worked and saved. In terms of personal freedom, it represents the possible loss of resources that enable that freedom.

For those who have amassed large reserves, the anxiety is typically couched in terms of a lawsuit or governmental regulation that may take it all away. This is the fear that spawned trusts and corporate protection.

For people of more modest means, the anxiety is more actuarially defined: “If I spend what I have gained on something I want now, I might run out later.” This is the tragic fear that you may outlive your savings.

FOMO

Next in the list of freedom-related neuroses is the oh-so-hip and recently coined “FOMO,” the fear of missing out. If you think Vegas punishes gamblers, wait until you see this investors’ paranoia in action. The train of thought is something like, “If I don’t do this thing right now, I might not get a chance.” FOMO foments the cognitive dissonance of the real estate and stock markets. Buy Bitcoin? You might get rich (and thus have a greater chance at personal freedom), and you might lose it all. Invest in multi-unit REITs? “Baby needs a new pair of shoes/hit me/seven come eleven – snake eyes!”

Bet it all on red.

Less common but not rare is so-called “option paralysis”: Steak or lobster? Drive or fly? Paris or Prague? As the commercial says, “What will you do with all the money you save?” There are so many choices that you can’t choose. Too much personal freedom? Definitely a good problem to have, but nonetheless anxiogenic.

Luckily, in almost all such cases, the number of options available to you are limited by what you can do and what you will do. What seemed overwhelmingly innumerous becomes a realistic two or three.

Tempus Fugit

Finally, personal freedom can engender existential anxiety. Sometimes it’s because you have spent a lifetime working towards personal freedom and are now approaching the end of that time. Sometimes it is because personal freedom allows you to shed the distractions that once shielded you from thoughts of your mortality. Busy builders don’t have time to reflect.

In your leisure time, when you are finally able to just relax, this most frightening inevitability rises from its Stygian lair and whispers to you:

This is all temporary.

So what’s the answer, the clever punch line at the end of the joke? I don’t think there is one. Just a cautionary tale for those who seek the road less traveled, a “be careful what you wish for” kind of story based on the experiences of many folks who have sought and found.

Still, a bit of anxiety is a small price to pay for personal freedom. Find your purpose.

As always, I welcome your thoughts. You can reach me through the comments section on my Substack or Medium accounts or the blog section on my website. If this article as of value to you, please follow my Instagram and Twitter accounts. And be sure to subscribe to my River Of Creation podcast – The Podcast for Creators! – coming later this year.

Be well; do good!

• JWW