I am sitting here in my favorite coffee shop, thinking and writing as I do every morning, but today is different. I am experiencing a slightly altered state of consciousness; a quiet and serene detachment from the busy scene all around me. I am in the environment but not of the environment (no, I don’t partake of any psyche-altering substances). As all of the sensory stimuli flow through and wash over me, I notice one interconnecting thread: We truly do live in a wonderful world.

Manifestations

My unexpectedly mystical mindset causes me to be aware of the fact that we humans - specifically, all of the people I currently observe - are part of a single organism in many ways; leaves on an invisible yet undeniably real tree. We all come from the same recycled set of basic elements, breathe the same air, share the same paradigm of double-helical nucleotides that literally make us who we are.

And yet, what a stunning display of phenotypal fireworks!

We are tall and short, young and old, stout and thin, light and dark, male and female, sleek and hirsute. The grace of our random ethnic and geographical beginnings considerably enriches the diversity on display. We hail from climes dry, tropical, temperate, continental and from every landmass: Indian, African, Asian, Caucasian and more.

To be more granular about it, just the cross-section of other humans in this one building reveals Pacific Islanders, Hispanics, Europeans, Asians, Africans, Native Americans, Scandinavians and all manner of combinations thereof. What a wondrous paradox that we can be so dissimilar and yet exactly alike in so many ways.

And just now, a tall pale young woman in jeans considers me with a quizzical smirk, a “What the hell are you looking at?” kind of smile in response to  my spaced-out observation of her as she walks through the shop with her friend.

Motivations

More nuanced and convoluted still, the range of observable behaviors on display hints at a near-infinite number of “whys” attached to these many “whos:”

A young Indian man in a hoodie sits at a corner table, avoiding eye contact, clearly telegraphing that he wants to avoid conversation.

A beautiful young Asian woman surreptitiously takes measure of a beautiful young Scandinavian woman standing in line next to her table, contrast and comparison leaking through her otherwise “casual” glances.

A handsome Black man glares at his phone, clearly annoyed at whomever is on the other end of the digital line, and completely oblivious to to those of us who share the same physical space.

A young girl enters the shop with her parents, trying out a bold (for her) off-the-shoulder top, clearly hoping that everyone sees her but no one looks at her.

A balding man whose ruddy complexion and ginger hair marks him as likely of Celtic descent is engrossed in examination of something on his laptop to the exclusion of everything happening around him.

The late-20-something grad student with long curly dark hair is here again. She is here almost every time I come in, reading and writing studiously as is the habitus of people pursuing advanced degrees.

We each have different reasons to be in this place at this time, yet we peacefully coexist in this man-made structure that shelters us from the wind and the rain.

And allows us, of course, to jointly partake of the communal psychotropic sacrament of caffeine.

Meanings

As varied as our reasons may be for being here in this coffee shop, the reasons behind those reasons are immensely more varied and complex.

Each of us has a purpose for being here, something that contributes a sliver of meaning to who we really are and what we really want.

The grad student isn’t writing that paper simply because it is a degree requirement; the degree she will eventually earn will prove - to her and perhaps to important others - that she actually is capable of completing such a difficult and lengthy task. She will become a “master” of the details of her chosen field, and the title of her degree will convey that accolade. And, hopefully, she will make more money.

The nervous young man who is clearly courting the cautiously aloof young woman across the table from him is testing himself as much as he is seeking companionship (or maybe just sex). Is he up to the challenge? Is he worthy of her attention? Of keeping it? Where does he need to mature, to grow, in order to be a contender in this most competitive of rituals?

The 60-something man in noise-cancelling headphones is editing a piece of music. Maybe he is a pro, and needs to get this composition out the door on a deadline to fulfill a contract. Maybe he has always been moved by the power of music and feeds his soul with this act of creation still, after all these years. Maybe both.

I come here day after day and think and write, because - as a result of decades of training and experience in human behavior - I observe and understand things that others might miss, or never consider in the first place. My writing might make some reader happier, or more compassionate or more aware. Those people might just make their world, and the world a happier and more compassionate place.

Our search for meaning may take on many guises, even if we don’t have clearly defined purposes for what we do and who we are. We all feel the pull to define meaning for our lives.

And as the Batesville truck leaves the mortuary on the other side of the narrow street, I am again reminded that we all share the same inescapable existential fate, no matter how different we may seem at first glance.

Wonderful World

I find that when I put my own expectations and biases aside and just observe, that I am - without fail - overwhelmed and delighted by how we are all flowers on the same rose bush. I am so grateful to be conscious in such a wonderful world.

We may take very different paths, different branches that we inhabit, but we all fundamentally seek light and growth. And like flowers, we have a limited amount of time to bloom before we fade.

I can’t imagine a better reason to consciously build a life of compassion and understanding.


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To learn more about how to use these concepts or to inquire about working with me, you can contact me on my Hardcore Happiness website, the comments section on my Substack or Medium accounts or the Hardcore Happiness Blog. If you have found value in this article, follow my Instagram account for daily insights, or my X account for occasional tweets. To support this community, you can Buy Me A Coffee or donate through my Patreon account.

- JWW